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Talkers!

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Topic: Talkers!

Posted By: BonnieD
Subject: Talkers!
Date Posted: 25 May 2004 at 9:42am

Today I had 2 middle-aged women in my car who talked (between themselves, never trying to include me in the conversation) the entire trip between Rolling Valley and 12th street. I even increased the volume on the radio so I could hear NPR and they just TALKED LOUDER!!

I have also noticed that more and more slugs are talking on cell phones (and not just the 1 minute "I'll be home in 20 honey" which is fine) but 15, 20 minute conversations.

I think that it would be rude to tell these people to shut-up but it is really starting to aggravate me. Anyone else noticing this?

Replies:

Posted By: greatday
Date Posted: 25 May 2004 at 10:48am

I'm in full agreement. I've had the chatter boxes in my car...maybe they should check out the slug rules again. I've also had the most important people in the world in my car becuase they JUST HAD to answer/talk on their cell phone in my car. I have no problem with the 1 minute call to whomever, but the prolonged conversations are an annoyance.

I think what I need to do is print up rules for my car, hand them to the slugs prior to getting in my car, and leave the decision up to them on whether they want to ride with me [:)]

Posted By: Luvmyhybrid
Date Posted: 25 May 2004 at 12:22pm

Is it possible that some of these sluggers may not know the rules? I think that maybe it's assumed that folks know or at least share the knowledge of the "slug", but from the sounds of some of the latest message boards, some have been been missed. I'll bet MOST slugs/drivers don't even know this website exists. My suggestion -- print up a few flyers, start a few down the slug line in the morning (ie, when you're done reading the short blip, hand it to the next person). Include things like "the top 10 rules (whatever those might be) for slugging (or driving)", a few do's & don't, and then put a plug in for this website. Bet you'll get a few "ah-ha's" --

Posted By: slugbug
Date Posted: 25 May 2004 at 1:13pm

I agree - A lot of folks don't know about this website...and with the "new generation" starting to slug more, we need to get the rules out. I've had several "young people" talk from one person to the next on the entire ride home......

So.....who wants to do the flyer...and who want to volunteer to help put them out???????[:0]

Posted By: salsita
Date Posted: 25 May 2004 at 1:20pm

I wouldn't say it's the young people or the "new generation" I'm one of those young people and I don't speak unless I'm spoken to. I've seen plenty of young and older people talking non-stop. If I'm not asked my opinion or whatever, I close my eyes and ignore.

Posted By: Luvmyhybrid
Date Posted: 25 May 2004 at 1:38pm

I think it's our job to constantly "inform" new sluggers. I recall vividly our first "slugging" experience. We stood a few feet behind the 610 line and just listened to the slugs in line, to the drivers and the general motion of things. You can gain alot from a visual, but I also think that there's many out there who are fearful of slugging. In order to ease those fears, it's up to the "old guard" (and I'm not talking age here) to inform. Maybe it's a start with getting the radios turned down or the two people in your backseat to talk quietly or not at all....

Posted By: Max_28756
Date Posted: 25 May 2004 at 3:44pm

This is a message to the person behind the curtain, aka "Admin". Will you please add No cell phone use beyond a simple "I'll be home in 15 min" type message in the Etiquette and Rules section. There aren't any references (that I read) that refer to cell phone usage and we have all been in a car with the person who either had to continue their work in the car or had to talk about last night's American Idol show. To all you cell phone users, I DON'T want to know your life story via your phone conversation. If you are that important, don't leave work.

Posted By: FromWoodbridge
Date Posted: 25 May 2004 at 4:26pm

so, what's a tactful way of telling someone to stop talking on their cell phones?

Posted By: Johnny Cakes
Date Posted: 25 May 2004 at 8:58pm

"Excuse me, but I really need to think though some things. I'd apprecate it if we could just ride in silence, please."

Posted By: JiggaJynx
Date Posted: 25 May 2004 at 9:02pm

As a driver, I turn the radio up louder--don't care if it's not tactful. As a rider, I try to ignore it, though one fellow rider was so noisy (and personal) on her cell all the way home that I apologized to the driver on behalf of all slugs when I exited.

Posted By: pb1974
Date Posted: 25 May 2004 at 9:11pm

Personally, I just think all this talk about "rules" is kind of silly. Not having a drawn-out conversation on the cell phone, not blaring the radio, etc. is pure common sense. Granted, many people lack this gene [:)], but anyone who would pay attention to the "rules" is probably someone who has enough common sense not to do these things anyway.

Posted By: VA_Slugger
Date Posted: 26 May 2004 at 8:16am

I'm inclined to agree with "Luv". It's up to the "seasoned" sluggers to put the word out to the new sluggers on how the system is "suppose" to work. I personally suggest, when asked by newcomers, that they get in, say hello, and sit back and go with the flow (within reason of course). I also tell them about the Slug-Lines.com website as a place for information, suggestions, and a good laugh every now-and-then. Didn't mean to sound like a public service announcement [;)], but it true. Anyway, Luv is on the right track.

Posted By: vabigblue
Date Posted: 26 May 2004 at 12:07pm

This website, not only the rules of engagement, but the message boards can provide new slugs with a wealth of information. If I am aware a slug is relatively new, I will direct him/her to this site. I think its an excellent site.

Posted By: RW
Date Posted: 26 May 2004 at 2:58pm

I found a quick solution to the talking problem. I wear ear plugs. Not only can I not hear anyone if they talk to me, but I don't have to listen to the radio or anything else. This Really helps my ride to and from work to be an enjoyable one.

rw

Posted By: phuncadelic
Date Posted: 26 May 2004 at 2:59pm

Does it really matter that other sluggers are having a conversation in the car? Or that someone is talking on their Cell phone? The whole idea of not speaking until spoken to.... isnt that idea like 100 years old. unless the conversationis rude, vulgur etc. I have no problem with it. I both ride and drive.

Posted By: phuncadelic
Date Posted: 26 May 2004 at 3:01pm

Posted By: phuncadelic
Date Posted: 26 May 2004 at 3:02pm

Posted By: VA_Slugger
Date Posted: 26 May 2004 at 3:10pm

Phuncadelic...I guess you really mean it. You said it thrice [:D].

I believe you, I really do!

Posted By: FromWoodbridge
Date Posted: 26 May 2004 at 4:37pm

As an occasional driver and frequent rider, I have been in cars where there have been conversations. There have been times when I asked if someone was ready, and they wanted to talk a lot on the way home. Many times I don't mind because I think people are interesting - even if I don't agree with them. My only beef is that I don't like long cell phone calls.

Posted By: slugbug
Date Posted: 26 May 2004 at 4:42pm

To be honest.......There have been days that I drive...and I'll be exhausted on the drive home.....and I PRAY that I pick up some talkative Slugs!!!![:)]

Posted By: vabigblue
Date Posted: 27 May 2004 at 7:45am

Maybe I leave too early, but I don't see or hear the conversations as alluded to. Maybe because I have on my headphones, but it really doesn't seem as if anyone is talking. Life is rough![:p]

Posted By: harlean
Date Posted: 27 May 2004 at 1:12pm

I may be the only one who agrees with phuncadelic. What is wrong with talking on the cell phone? I've done it as a rider - sometimes it's personal, sometime it's a call from work. I've also seen - or heard - drivers to the same.

If a driver tells me to put away my cell phone I will tell him/her I'll do it if they will pay my $80 bill (for 2 phones).

However, I will say this: a conversation in another language other than English IS rude. And I am trilingual - English, Spanish and French. I do not carry conversations in a language other than English.

Posted By: pb1974
Date Posted: 27 May 2004 at 1:27pm

No offense, but that is a pretty bold (rude) response for someone who is using someone else's car to get home. Say that to the driver, and don't be surprised if they tell YOU to pay for their car or get out.

(btw, I am a rider, not a driver)

quote:
Originally posted by harlean
[br]
If a driver tells me to put away my cell phone I will tell him/her I'll do it if they will pay my $80 bill (for 2 phones).

Posted By: harlean
Date Posted: 27 May 2004 at 1:54pm

I would gladly get out and hope they get a ticket for not being HOV-compliant. They didn't HAVE to pick me up did they? If my conversation is not offensive (like the thread in another post) then why do you care if I talk on the phone?

And I don't talk on the phone all the time, every day, on each trip. Just when it is necessary - a friend in need or a problem at work. THAT should not be a problem.

Posted By: chinquapin
Date Posted: 27 May 2004 at 2:23pm

Well put, Roadrunner. Harlean's attitude could qualify her as a charter member of a "do not pick up" list.
[;)]

Posted By: emancilla
Date Posted: 27 May 2004 at 2:28pm

Harlean, they would care because it is THEIR CAR. You can have cellphone conversations all you want if you're the driver.
The only time I see to use the cellphone as a slug will be if it's an emergency previous to letting the driver know.
Other than that, I consider it as plain rude.

Posted By: Stuck2
Date Posted: 27 May 2004 at 3:17pm

I think the point is EXCESSIVE talking. And yes excessive cell phone talking is annoying and rude (it's rude in stores, walking down streets and in cars). The idea is to be polite and if you are going to converse solely with a particular individual and not the whole car, make sure it's done quietly so that the radio could be heard or another conversation could be heard. Also, if you get or have to make a call make sure it's brief -- Hi, it's so and so. I'm in a carpool and have to be quick....

It's also impossible to demand that your riders don't engage in conversations. It's human nature to chat.

People are forgetting how to be polite these days.

Posted By: Max_28756
Date Posted: 27 May 2004 at 3:18pm

Harlean makes this sound like a "us and them" arrangement. This is anything but an "us and them" arrangement as it is a mutual respect for the needs and personal space of both the drivers and passengers. We need each other to exist. As a slug (aka rider) 99% of the time, I am very grateful for the ride and sit back and enjoy the view of those sitting in traffic as we drive by. Let's not have any of us think we are intitled to anything more than a common goal of getting to and from work in a way that cuts down on traffic.

Posted By: NEWYORKER
Date Posted: 27 May 2004 at 3:35pm

WOW - three languages. Maybe you should have invested in taking lessons in manners not languages.

quote:
Originally posted by harlean
[br]I may be the only one who agrees with phuncadelic. What is wrong with talking on the cell phone? I've done it as a rider - sometimes it's personal, sometime it's a call from work. I've also seen - or heard - drivers to the same.

If a driver tells me to put away my cell phone I will tell him/her I'll do it if they will pay my $80 bill (for 2 phones).

However, I will say this: a conversation in another language other than English IS rude. And I am trilingual - English, Spanish and French. I do not carry conversations in a language other than English.

NYC

Posted By: harlean
Date Posted: 27 May 2004 at 4:10pm

New Yorker, I'm not American-born. As many of you can't even speak your own language. My manners are better than most of you I encounter every day, especially in the Metro. You just don't understand - or refuse to understand us. If you want to keep discussing this email me.

In any case, I think Stuck2 has hit the actual issue: "EXCESSIVE talking." That IS rude. But just how do you tell the slug you just picked up to shut it? The slug can't tell YOU to shut it, so why should you have the privilege?

I agree with Max_28756 in that "we need each other to exist." So, if you want to enforce such a rule in your car, then how do you do that?

What about the slug who is not talking on the phone? Shouldn't his/her wishes be heard and respected too? How do you find a happy medium for everyone in the confined space for 45+ minutes? I honestly don't think you can without someone getting an attitude.

Posted By: emancilla
Date Posted: 27 May 2004 at 4:25pm

Harlean, I'm afraid you're overeacting. NewYorker wasn't trying to be racist. He just pointed out the fact that your responses are a little bit aggresive.
The fact that you don't see a problem talking on the cellphone without letting the driver known is rude. Even if the driver denied the request it's his/her perogative because you're riding in his/her car.

Posted By: slugbug
Date Posted: 27 May 2004 at 4:35pm

TIME OUT!!! CHANGE SUBJECTS. OBVIOUSLY HARLEAN "DOES NOT" GET IT! NOT WORTH TRYING TO EXPLAIN ANY FURTHER[:D]

Posted By: argentinian_belle
Date Posted: 27 May 2004 at 5:03pm

I have to agree with Phuncadelic... we're not to do personal things at work (where we're at for at least 8 -9 hours a day), and then we can't do it on the way home because a driver or a rider might be disturbed, when are you supposed to do it? when you're in the kitchen cooking for the family and trying to spend sometime with them before you go to bed so you can get up the next morning to go work another long day?? i dont see what's so wrong with carring a conversation. why are people being so antisocial nowadays????

quote:
Originally posted by phuncadelic
[br]Does it really matter that other sluggers are having a conversation in the car? Or that someone is talking on their Cell phone? The whole idea of not speaking until spoken to.... isnt that idea like 100 years old. unless the conversationis rude, vulgur etc. I have no problem with it. I both ride and drive.

Posted By: glacier
Date Posted: 27 May 2004 at 5:04pm

Slugbug,

I need to respectfully disagree, we should not change the subject. This is the most entertaining thread I've seen in a long time. Just think of Harlean as a free laugh.

RoadRunner: Please excuse my bluntness, but may I suggest the Evyln Woodhead Sped Redden Course to bring you up to speed in the international language of English

Cheers,

Glacier

Posted By: pb1974
Date Posted: 27 May 2004 at 7:11pm

argentinian belle - I don't see it as people being antisocial. Most people are social at work for the entire day and see the car as their moment of peace and quiet before they go home to their spouse, kids, or whom/whatever. I don't really know how you ask someone not to speak in your car, but if everyone uses some common sense and courtesy, it then becomes a moot issue.

Posted By: ronin718
Date Posted: 28 May 2004 at 7:58am

quote:
Originally posted by argentinian_belle
[br]I have to agree with Phuncadelic... we're not to do personal things at work (where we're at for at least 8 -9 hours a day), and then we can't do it on the way home because a driver or a rider might be disturbed, when are you supposed to do it? when you're in the kitchen cooking for the family and trying to spend sometime with them before you go to bed so you can get up the next morning to go work another long day?? i dont see what's so wrong with carring a conversation. why are people being so antisocial nowadays????

I think this can be handled easily. If you want to do personal things on your way to/from work, then drive yourself. That will give you 1-2 hours of time each way to take care of them before you're bogged down by the office or family. Pick up slugs if you want to use the HOV lanes, but that cuts down on the personal time.

The point is people are being extremely rude by carrying on prolonged conversations on their cell phones in a confined area with a captive audience to NOT enjoy it. This can go both ways, driver and slugs, but the driver is the one putting out the cash in gas, wear/tear, and parking at the work end, so he/she should get a LITTLE slack.

While slugs are doing the driver a service in allowing for the use of HOV lanes, they are STILL GUESTS in the vehicle. How many of us would go to a stranger's house, plop down in the living room, and fire up our cell phone for a prolonged, sometimes loud, conversation? Didn't think so. Why do it in the car?

Posted By: emancilla
Date Posted: 28 May 2004 at 10:53am

Argentinian belle, yes, you're not to do personal things at work. That's what your lunch time is for. And it's not being anti-social. It's having good manners.

Posted By: Max_28756
Date Posted: 28 May 2004 at 11:34am

Has anyone noticed that this web site has become less informative and more of a complaint department. It seems as though there's not as much work being done as we might hope the boss thinks we do. Our complaints seem to encompass Hybrids, cell phones, violators of the HOV and rude behavior. Does that about sum it up?

Posted By: argentinian_belle
Date Posted: 28 May 2004 at 11:36am

quote:
Originally posted by emancilla
[br]Argentinian belle, yes, you're not to do personal things at work. That's what your lunch time is for. And it's not been anti-social. It's having good manners.

well, let me explain myself a little better, I don't mean to say that it's ok to talk on the cell phone for the whole entire trip, but i dont think it's fair to limiting the calls to a simple "will be there in 20" either.

Posted By: emancilla
Date Posted: 28 May 2004 at 12:38pm

quote:
Originally posted by argentinian_belle
[br]
quote:
Originally posted by emancilla
[br]Argentinian belle, yes, you're not to do personal things at work. That's what your lunch time is for. And it's not being anti-social. It's having good manners.

well, let me explain myself a little better, I don't mean to say that it's ok to talk on the cell phone for the whole entire trip, but i dont think it's fair to limiting the calls to a simple "will be there in 20" either.

What I'd do is to ask the driver if he/she cares before I'd attempt to make a phone call because I'm a guest in their car. And yes, a brief conversation would be a plus.

Posted By: emancilla
Date Posted: 28 May 2004 at 12:41pm

quote:
Originally posted by Max_28756
[br]Has anyone noticed that this web site has become less informative and more of a complaint department. It seems as though there's not as much work being done as we might hope the boss thinks we do. Our complaints seem to encompass Hybrids, cell phones, violators of the HOV and rude behavior. Does that about sum it up?

I've noticed it too. However, I think discussions and complaints are also informative. [:)]

Posted By: DC2RV
Date Posted: 28 May 2004 at 1:17pm

Max - as you point out, this site has been filled with mostly complaints for some time now. It's complaints and some who treat this as a chat room who it make the site seem less useful than it was before. Case in point - on another thread someone asked about Pentagon drop offs. One of the replies was "I don't know". Well if you don't know, why reply???

Luckily, there are still enough helpful people here who understand that this site is a resource.

Posted By: jenna703
Date Posted: 28 May 2004 at 1:27pm

Maybe Drivers (like myself) should write on our side windows:

Today, I feel:______, Please do/do not talk to me. If you choose to talk on the phone while I drive, I will "accidently" spill coffee on you or turn my radio up reeeaaaalllly loud. I have rights too, especially since I'm driving...if you don't like it, then too bad...wait for another car. [:D]

quote:
Originally posted by chinquapin
[br]Well put, Roadrunner. Harlean's attitude could qualify her as a charter member of a "do not pick up" list.
[;)]

Posted By: ronin718
Date Posted: 28 May 2004 at 3:43pm

quote:
Originally posted by DC2RV
[br]Max - as you point out, this site has been filled with mostly complaints for some time now. It's complaints and some who treat this as a chat room who it make the site seem less useful than it was before. Case in point - on another thread someone asked about Pentagon drop offs. One of the replies was "I don't know". Well if you don't know, why reply???

Luckily, there are still enough helpful people here who understand that this site is a resource.

1. The useful thing about the complaints is maybe someone who reads this site might recognize their boorish behavior and change. They also help provide comic relief in a stressful day.

2. I've noticed the same thing about useless comments. I've noticed a couple users particularly guilty of said actions (like the comment "hmmmmm"). Maybe they're trying to run up their post count so they can get more stars by their name.

Posted By: pb1974
Date Posted: 28 May 2004 at 8:13pm

Please excuse my semi-worthless comment, but ronin, my friend, I believe you've hit the nail right on the head. I feel better that I'm not the only one who has been annoyed by this. [:)]

quote:
Originally posted by ronin718

2. I've noticed the same thing about useless comments. I've noticed a couple users particularly guilty of said actions (like the comment "hmmmmm"). Maybe they're trying to run up their post count so they can get more stars by their name.

Posted By: DC2RV
Date Posted: 30 May 2004 at 9:48pm

Hmmmmm, good point, thanks, me too, i don't know, ditto, what he/she said ...

I'm not going to confirm that one of my annoyances is "e" followed by 8 letters because I'm not certain of the gender of said individual. However, I will say that one of the major annoyances, are posts by an "a" preceded by 8 letters. (184 posts and counting since December 03.)

Posted By: vabigblue
Date Posted: 01 Jun 2004 at 7:51am

quote:
Originally posted by Max_28756
[br]Has anyone noticed that this web site has become less informative and more of a complaint department. It seems as though there's not as much work being done as we might hope the boss thinks we do. Our complaints seem to encompass Hybrids, cell phones, violators of the HOV and rude behavior. Does that about sum it up?

Yeh, I've noticed the site; however, just think, ten years ago, we wouldn't even be discussing these issues. These sites actually are a benefit for everyone. I think it gives everyone a chance to voice their own opinion. These posts could go a long ways in getting stuff done in some cases. I say "keep on griping". Thanks[8D]

Posted By: phuncadelic
Date Posted: 01 Jun 2004 at 8:31am

I definately agree with jenna703 the only way to solve this problem would be to put a sign up!

quote:
Originally posted by jenna703
[br]Maybe Drivers (like myself) should write on our side windows:

Today, I feel:______, Please do/do not talk to me. If you choose to talk on the phone while I drive, I will "accidently" spill coffee on you or turn my radio up reeeaaaalllly loud. I have rights too, especially since I'm driving...if you don't like it, then too bad...wait for another car. [:D]

quote:
Originally posted by chinquapin
[br]Well put, Roadrunner. Harlean's attitude could qualify her as a charter member of a "do not pick up" list.
[;)]

Posted By: emancilla
Date Posted: 01 Jun 2004 at 8:39am

quote:
Originally posted by vabigblue
[br]
quote:
Originally posted by Max_28756
[br]Has anyone noticed that this web site has become less informative and more of a complaint department. It seems as though there's not as much work being done as we might hope the boss thinks we do. Our complaints seem to encompass Hybrids, cell phones, violators of the HOV and rude behavior. Does that about sum it up?

Yeh, I've noticed the site; however, just think, ten years ago, we wouldn't even be discussing these issues. These sites actually are a benefit for everyone. I think it gives everyone a chance to voice their own opinion. These posts could go a long ways in getting stuff done in some cases. I say "keep on griping". Thanks[8D]

Well put, vabigblue!