Forgive me, but I must vent |
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jjmahoney
New Slug Joined: 07 Mar 2003 Location: VA Status: Offline Points: 0 |
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Posted: 14 May 2004 at 9:18am |
How many of us know the unspoken rules of slugging? I think most of us do. The one that I would think would be the clearest is the "do not speak unless spoken to BY THE DRIVER" for the riders. I've only had a handful of occasions where I've had chatty riders. If a friend gets in my car, usually we'll chat for a little bit. But it is MY car, so that's my right. But I don't think I've ever had it as bad as I had this morning. I picked up from Horner Road as I always do, and two ladies got in rather quickly (there was actually a line of people waiting). A hispanic woman got in the back, and an african american woman got in the front. I was looking forward to a nice quiet drive, listening to the news, etc., just like every other morning.
Well, that was dashed to pieces within the first 2 minutes. Apparently they know each other. The one in the back is separated from her husband, has four kids, is moving to FL, blah blah blah. For the ENTIRE DAMN RIDE they talked about her situation. She hates church now apparently, she hates black men now too (her husband is black, she's hispanic). I spare the majority of the details (and belive me, I got them ALL!!) I tried a few times to be subtle and turn the radio up so I could hear it...they just started talking louder. I turned it up again, they talked even louder. For the entire hour drive from Horner Rd. to their destinations on 18th street they were talking (traffic was bad in the HOV this morning, it figures!) So tell me, should I have said something? I was so close many times, with certain comments, to ask them to stop. The woman in the back said a$$hole a few times, and even called church "bulls**t" because of what her church was telling her husband (and I'm a church going fella, so that offended me). I didn't want to be the bad guy, and I didn't want them to feel uncomfortable for the rest of their drive. But in all honesty, looking back on it, they were making ME UNCOMFORTABLE IN MY OWN CAR!! I shouldn't care how I make them feel if I ask them to stop. Usually people will chat for a few minutes, then once we're on the HOV, they stop. I was appalled and furious. I barely gave them a thank you, and quickly drove off when they finally got out. Is it appropriate to ask slugs to stop talking? I think it is. I just wish I had. It would have spared me from getting to work so angry. _________________ "The message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God." I Corinthians 1:18 |
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slugbug
New Slug Joined: 14 May 2004 Location: va Status: Offline Points: 0 |
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With so many other important things going on in the world, I think it's a bit "petty" to allow conversation/talking agitate you. HOWEVER, you should have stood your ground as far as what TYPE of conversation was going on in your presence/your car. After the first curse word, I would've politely said....."Can you watch your language please"....and if they would've been offended...oh well. Some times people need to know that it's NOT okay to CURSE around any and everyone...I usually give people the "that is so rude" look when they do it to me....which usually makes them change their tune.
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vabigblue
New Slug Joined: 16 Jul 2003 Location: VA Status: Offline Points: 0 |
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I feel you JJ. Obviously your riders did not know or care about the rules of slugging. I think you had a twofold issue confronting you. First, the lady who was separated needed to "vent" her frustrations while her friend was a crutch to lean on. While they didn't care if you were there or not, the story was going to be told and supported by the front seater. It sounds like the more support given, the more the other lady vented. Secondly, I believe you certainly had the right to tell them to settle down; however, what would the outcome been of that? The question is - could you have made the issue less volatile by asking them to be quiet? If not, that could have ruined your day even more. I think you probably did the right thing by trying to ignore these ladies while at the same time making a note of who they were for future references. Just my opinion. Thanks
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Bob
New Slug Joined: 14 Dec 2001 Status: Offline Points: 0 |
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I think you have a right to state a couple of ground rules when riders get in. I once had a driver make a statement before we took off that he didn't like long cell phone conversations. I guess if I drove a lot I would probably get to a point where I would have a standard statement at the beginning of the ride including seat belt use and long conversations on the cell phone or otherwise. I was in a car a couple of weeks ago and the lady in the back was yakking loudly and angrily in the cell phone for what seemed like half the trip. As a slug, I came very close to saying something as we got out. To those who talk on cell phones -- have some consideration for your captive audience. What I just described is RUDE.
Bob |
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VA_Slugger
New Slug Joined: 09 Apr 2003 Location: VA Status: Offline Points: 0 |
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You all have very valid comments for JJ. I'm with vabigblue..."make a note of who they are" and stay away from them and all the drama! [:0]
Enjoy! |
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emancilla
New Slug Joined: 30 Sep 2003 Location: Virginia Status: Offline Points: 0 |
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I agree. They should definetely be in the "do not pick up" list. One thing is listening to a conversation with proper language and other is cursing in your "own car." I don't think is appropiate. It's rude.
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jjmahoney
New Slug Joined: 07 Mar 2003 Location: VA Status: Offline Points: 0 |
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quote: If you had been in the car you would understand what I mean. I've had people talk in the car before, and the person in the back seat has leaned up close so they weren't shouting. These two were practically shouting, and at times, laughing so loud I couldn't hear myself think OR the radio. When they would stop for a second, and I thought they were done, the front person asked ANOTHER question. Each time I got more and more annoyed. Come to think of it, I didn't hear the radio at all, because I didn't want to blow their ears out. I usually keep the radio volume so that I can just hear it above the sound of the car and road noise (about 15 on my volume control). At 15, I still couldn't hear it because of how loud they were. It may sound petty to you, but it was flat out rude of them. I want a quiet drive into work. I don't need to hear two women complain about their lives and how much they hate men. _________________ "The message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God." I Corinthians 1:18 |
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motownldy199
New Slug Joined: 24 Apr 2004 Location: VA Status: Offline Points: 0 |
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quote: Well, there's always the option of driving alone. [;)] |
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JiggaJynx
New Slug Joined: 01 Aug 2003 Location: VA Status: Offline Points: 0 |
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I don't think you are petty at all. If I had been in your shoes, I'd have held it in, too, and fumed inside. It happened in my office once, when my office mate had a visitor that blabbed on and on about very personal details of her female problems, the trials and tribulations of being a single mom, her daughter's arrest for drugs, etc., so I know how you feel. You took the high road. Still, I wonder how they would have reacted if you had joined into the conversation. In the vein of "what I shoulda said was...." I wish I'd done that. [;)]
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slugbug
New Slug Joined: 14 May 2004 Location: va Status: Offline Points: 0 |
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I in no way meant to sound as if I was insensitive with the situation. I guess in a nutshell.......NOTHING.....I MEAN NOTHING in life comes without issues. Slugging IS a option for both the slugger and the driver, which means, you're not going to be satisfied 100% of the time.....how many smooth rides have you had compared to the ocassional 2-4 incidents per year? Or, as someone else stated, there's definitely one sure way to avoid these problems.
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